Anyway, I made the very difficult decision to stay in the states for treatment and not return to Taiwan. This was truly one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made about my future and I'm so missing everyone there, especially the students. I so enjoyed meeting such incredible young adults and I'll miss the people of Taiwan.
As I reflect on my time there, I thought I'd end my blog by discussing what it was like moving and living as an expat in Taiwan. A college friend suggested I do this and I thought it would be both a good way to end this wonderful part of my life and to share what it was like moving halfway around the world.
First, the difficult things about living abroad:
- Feeling lonely - it's bound to happen since you move away from everyone in your life (unless your family is going with you). I spend an amazing amount of time alone. Not that I mind my own company but at times it got to me. I have two incredible daughters and some wonderful family and friends. These people know my story and know me. In Taiwan, I met so many great people but we don't share those memories and stories yet and it isn't always easy building those new relationships. I spent so much time alone that when I did have a chance to hang out with adults, I became overly self-disclosing and probably seemed like I was self-centered. I was so happy to be sharing something in my life and became a bit needy. That's not a personality trait I normally have so this was new to me.
- Not to give a hard time to my friends and family but some people are much better at keeping in touch. My daughters, thankfully, were so good about touching base and technology helped us stay part of our daily lives. Some of my friends and family were good to keep in touch but so many people didn't keep in touch at all. Honestly, I was surprised by this but then I realized that moving away from everyone can change and end relationships. It's inevitable. This realization didn't make it easier to deal with but it's part of growing up. I chose this path, not them.
- It's hard to find a certain balance in your life when working abroad. Everything in my life there was connected to the school...my job, my apartment, my social life and my adventures outside of school. You never seem to escape work when so much is centered around your job. This isn't healthy for me. I found that the longer I was there, the more I craved building relationships with people outside of my job. That was when I felt most like myself.
- It's hard being so far away from the people you love most. This was my adventure and I'm so very happy I did this (and wish I was able to complete my time there) but I did miss my daughters and I know it was hard for them too. When I got hurt I know they felt terrible that they couldn't be there for me. They never made me feel bad or guilty for not being there for them; they told me they were proud of me. But I know they are happy I'm back (at least I hope so).
The positives about living abroad:
- I can't begin to list all of the wonderful things about working and living abroad but the first that comes to mind is the people I met. The Taiwanese people are so warm, friendly and giving. I miss them every day. One couple, Kei and Leyang, made me feel so welcome and took care of me when I was hurt. They became my favorite people to be with and I miss them all of the time. I can't thank them enough for their friendship. I also met so many great teachers and staff at KAS who are so fun, talented and generous. I was so lucky to work with such an incredible group of people. And the students! I loved teaching middle school students and so many of them touched my heart. I smile just thinking about them and miss them each and every day. They are the biggest reason making this decision not to return was so difficult. They made my going to work each day a gift.
- A new culture, history and area to explore and learn about...what an amazing experience. I have always been interested in learning about the world around me but living in Asia was the best way to learn about the amazing things this part of the world has to offer. I can't wait to go back to explore some more!
- Everyone should live where they are in the minority. It gives you a perspective unlike any other. If you have read my posts you know that I was stared at ALL the time while living in Taiwan. I get it...I'm tall, red hair, big blue eyes and I don't look like 99% of the people who live there. It's challenging but also so rewarding that I could live in a place where I didn't know the language, had to learn the etiquette and culture and had to navigate living a life I had never lived before. Doing some of this was incredibly challenging (especially when I was hurt and couldn't communicate or advocate for myself as a patient) but I learned so much about myself during this year living abroad. I won't get on soapbox here but everyone, especially Americans, need to get a new global perspective and living abroad is a sure way of doing that.
- I became a better teacher. I was teaching in a school where 99.9% of the students are English Language Learners. I had to not only teach a subject, I had to begin learning a new language and figure out a way to teach students who didn't speak any or little English. I had done some of this in the states but not like this. I learned so very much as I went through the year. Also, the educational culture is so strong in Taiwan and it was such a change to be truly appreciated as a teacher. I will miss that!
I hope to return to Taiwan in the future and also explore other parts of Asia. I will do this because my world adventures have just begun. Thank you to all who have read my blog posts during the past year. It was so much fun sharing my life and I hope my reflections and adventures brought you some insight on Taiwan, made you laugh and gave you a glimpse into what it is like to live abroad.
